On How To Tell Stories Of Hope

Rigozo

“Please!” I said dryly, “Today will be the same as yesterday. You don’t believe me? Look up. I have been walking for miles and that cloud over there, yes, that one. That cloud has not moved from its position. You don’t believe me? There’s nothing wrong with my eyes.”

I was talking to myself.

Again.

I was walking in the midst of thousands of people, but not one of them noticed me. How long ago was it when I first opened my eyes in this world? I had lost count of the days.

“Comot for road,” a voice said roughly behind me.

I barely managed to move out of the way before a woman brushed past me. I said that I was sorry, but I wasn’t sure who it was meant for – me or the woman.

Wait!

She saw me?

She touched me?

I didn’t think it was possible after all the time I spent wandering and searching for anybody who could understand me, or even see me.

The embers of hope in my lifeless chest bloomed into warmth as I craned my neck to see which direction she went, but the crowd had swallowed her up. I didn’t despair. What I thought was impossible had happened and I believed that anything was possible.

With renewed vigor I plunged into the crowed in search of the woman who could tell me who I was and why I was here.


Holla,

I wrote this story because it represented how I felt all day. I got something that I’ve wanted for a long time, but I may not be able to keep it. Just like the person in the story, I felt numb and helpless.

Which was why wrote the ending the way I did. I hope that I’ll be able to find a way to overcome my situation. I want nothing more than for the main character in the story to find that woman and find the answers to all of her questions. I was more than happy to keep hope alive.

Enough of the doom and gloom!

What’s important to me is that nothing is set in stone. I know that the story can change and that’s why I won’t let the situation of today cloud the hope for tomorrow.

And the same goes for you.

Just remember that you can always choose how you interpret the story, no matter the situation. You can choose to see the situation from a different perspective, hope that things get better, fight to stay positive in a world full of negativity and brace yourself for whatever the outcome may be.

#Day 6 My Journal Series.

Receiving Flowers And All The Benefits

Rigozo

The other day I found this on Instagram.

Credit: @blommavase on Instagram
Credit: @blommavase on Instagram

I’m very upset. Because I have never received flowers before.

Ever!

You may be wondering why I’m turning red in the face because of flowers. It is because a few days ago, I saw dried flowers used as a prop at a photo shoot. And after reading much about flowers and appreciating them from afar, it was a sore reminder that I was missing out.

Flowers are not forever, but how I wish dearly and look forward to receiving them. I’ll place them in a jar of water and put it where I can see it as often as possible. Afterward, I will dry them and press them within the pages of a book. Yes, I’m a hopeless romantic.

The longer I wait for that elusive someone to give me flowers, the more likely it is that my anxiety level rises. I mean who doesn’t like receiving gifts, however receiving flowers is a whole new level. The only remedy is to order flowers for me by myself and act surprised when it comes. That would be hilarious but I don’t want to miss out. You may think it is such a little thing but receiving flowers or having them around does amazing things to your health.

Photo credit: Pinterest

The good news is I have received a plant before from my friend Noah (I can’t find where I saved the pictures).

It was an Aloe Vera bush with the most beautiful coat of green I have ever seen (yes, I’m biased). I called my plant Catherina, and my mood honestly improved when I got her.
I felt all loving and nurturing like a mother and had this connection with mother earth. I had been granted the responsibility of watching over life and witnessing its transforming power and yes, I was a bit conceited😂. So, I want flowers as soon as possible (even though they won’t last for long).

PS My Catherina (aloe vera bush) emaciated weeks after staying with me. I had to return her to Noah before she returned to the earth. I guess I need to learn how to take care of plants first.😓

Photo credit: Pexel

Studies have shown that flowers not only appeal to our senses of sight and smell but there are also tremendous health benefits to be had from receiving flowers.

To purify the air

The basic science that we all know is that humans inhale oxygen and exhale carbon dioxide. Plants require carbon dioxide for photosynthesis, and in turn, they give back oxygen. Our leafy neighbors also help to reduce dust particles which is a great help to tackle respiratory problems. When next you receive flowers and you keep them in your room, know that the air just a lot cleaner.

Get your glow on

Ever feel gloomy and down, and everywhere you look has a gray cast? That moment right there is when receiving flowers would make all the difference. Well, studies have shown that flowers can add the dash of color that you need to brighten up your day. You BLOOM and GLOW, and open up to positive vibes and energies. When women receive flowers, it improves their mood and gives them that much-needed feeling of being cared for and loved. The same goes for men. Receiving flowers induces warmth and leaves you feeling like cotton candy inside.

Improve your mental health

Flowers help to improve your emotional balance, keeping you on the sunny side of the spectrum. This is great because you get to tick off depression and anxiety from your list, and your mental health improves tremendously – that bottle of Xanax will stay untouched in the cabinet – especially when you are receiving flowers from the ones you love. Lavender and Jasmine are known to reduce stress, and Chamomile, commonly taken as a tea is notorious for its anti-anxiety effects. I guess you can say that flowers are all-natural anti-depressants.

Sian Wild says, “Flowers are proven to help reduce recovery time. Although flowers are no longer permitted in hospitals, if someone is ill or recuperating at home, a thoughtful bunch of blooms can generate a sense of wellbeing. Blood pressure and heart rate levels will be reduced.” Flowers and good health are related.

In my previous post, I talked about how little things can make a big difference, and the act of giving and receiving flowers is one of such little things. It conveys emotions that do not require words, puts a smile on people’s faces, and remember that it can improve poor health.

Now you know why I want to receive flowers and why you should too. If you can, send your loved one flowers today, it would be a simple gesture that will go a long way to make their day sparkle.


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Like, share, and comment about receiving flowers

Why Little Things Make A Big Difference

Rigozo

Hello guys, let’s play a game. No need to panic it’s not Squid Game guys. This game will help us understand why the little things are impactful.

I want you to read the sentence below, and as you do so count the number of Fs that you find.

A game that serves as an analogy for show how the little things affect the big picture - Matt Abraham, Stanford Graduate School of Business.

Awesome. How many Fs did you find? 3, 4, 5, or 6?

Did you perhaps miss the two-letter words ending in Fs?

Feel free to check the sentence again.

Matt Abraham from Stanford Graduate School of Business used this game as an analogy in his lecture – Think Fast, Talk Smart: Communication Techniques – to teach his class the little things that can affect speaking in public spontaneously. According to him, “It’s the little things that make a big difference in being effective.”

If your answer was incorrect do not think that you are not smart (olodo). However, it’s as a result of not paying attention to the teeny weeny things.

Little things can make a big difference

Don’t make the mistake of thinking that neglecting the little things will only have consequences in spontaneous speaking. Can you not recall a time when it was the little things that kept you sane?

The other day I was washed, pressed dressed, and ready to leave the house. I was going to be late if I did not leave on time, traffic being what it is in town. I was going to take the bus but couldn’t find my keys. I hear you groaning too. It is one of the most infuriating situations a person can find themselves in.

I was disgruntled and pulled at my hair as I searched all over the apartment for the keys. I went back to the table where we kept the keys and stared blankly at the empty spot where the keys should have been. I was late and bemoaned my existence.

The takeaway is that you need to pay close attention to those little things that can be easily overlooked. They come back to bite you in the butt – take a huge chunk too. They may likely ruin your plans. So keep it in mind that doing the little things make a huge difference between getting it right and making a mess.

If only I had returned the keys to the table when I got home from work the previous day. It was such a little thing to do that would save me time and energy.

For you, it could be taking a 20mins break from work every day, or waking up early to meditate and plan your day, or it could be a smile from a stranger, or wearing your favorite shirt, or cooking a meal for your spouse, or staying consistent with your exercise routine, walking the dog in the evening, tending to your plants, feeling wanted and loved and so on.

These little things can a big difference in your day, your relationship, your work, and your life in general.

Conclusion

The little things are called little for a reason. They are those things that you see and yet you don’t see. You may not be able to realize it until it may be too late. By paying attention to yourself and your surrounding you’ll be able to notice the little things that you miss. Spend time doing these little things that give you pleasure, makes you stronger, lifts your spirit, improves your productivity and better your life.

Photo Credit: Pixels


You rock🤘🏽

Thursday Talk Series | Augustine Ojeh Seeks Clarity of Purpose

Rigozo

Let’s play a game. Not Squid Game guys (I haven’t watched the movie but a lot of you are very loud about it). This game is simple and nonfatal, please. I want you to read the sentence below, and as you do so count the number of Fs that you find.

Awesome. How many Fs did you find? 3, 4, 5, or 6? Click here to see the answer and find out whether you are smart or not. Did you get the right answer? 😁😏

Moving on. Today, I’ll be introducing Augustine Ojeh. Let me confess. I have reason to believe that he gets high from giving expression and meaning to the world around him with words. Having recently made his acquaintance, I have no informed impression of his person. However, I can tell you that I deduced he’s a craftsman who has a sizzling relationship with words by stalking his Instagram page. Yes, that’s right! I did that. I was curious you see, and best believe that now I want to know even more about him.😂 I’m aware that he’s an earnest coach – ready to teach and also learn. He’s a book-lover, has no pet that I know of, is a certified night owl, and is an amazing writer and editor.


Q. Can you introduce yourself and what you do?

A. Augustine Ojeh here. Somewhere deep down, I reaffirm myself to be a genius but, in reality, I’m just another nobody, scratching his way upwards and seeking clarity of purpose. In my quest for clarity, I read books. I wouldn’t say it’s been a lot of books but enough to heighten my curiosity and desire to teach. What better way to learn than to teach? So, I’m a writer, editor, and writing coach. I write about business growth, global and workplace sustainability, diversity (gender, racial, and cultural), economics, and a pinch of psychology (for the love of it). However, I’m a questioner of illogical religious doctrines and the credulity of its believers. Some (including clergymen) have called me an Atheist but I’ll excuse their assertions to their purportedly ill understandings of Atheism.

Augustine Ojeh at his favorite space that he calls Saturn
Augustine Ojeh

Q. Why do you do your job, and would you rather do something else?

A. I wouldn’t say that I have a job. Just as footballers never called playing soccer a job, writing has never been a job to me. At least, I’ve never seen it that way and probably never will. I’d do something else if it has a negative opportunity cost, like starting and building a business which I’m already doing (won’t say more than that). However, I doubt if any of that would stop me from writing.

Q. What’s your idea of real success and how can it be achieved?

A. The “real” seems weird. Success is never faked. And, in my opinion, there’s no rigid formula to achieving it. I have several ideas of success, depending on what area of my life is under the magnifying lenses. In marriage, parenting, career, mental development, and all others, the ideas of success change. The methods to achieving each also vary. In marriage and mental development, for instance, stern principles are important while in parenting and career, flexibility and amenability to change are virtues.

Q. What is your morning routine like?

A. a. Wake up by 9:00 AM. That alarm is annoying and the funny thing is that the 9 am alarm description reads, “OJEH, YOU’VE GOT 1,440 MINUTES TODAY. NOW, GET IN THE TOILET, YOU PISS OF SHIT!”

b. Sit on the toilet seat for 30 minutes (maybe drop some poops if there’s any coming. Eewww! But it does feel good.)

c. Bath right after.

d. Brew some coffee in the kitchen.

e. Read three important newsletters [from the New York Times (US), The Economist (UK), and Punch (NG)] while I wait for coffee.

f. Read and respond to emails.

g. Update my to-dos for the day.

Q. What two things do you think of the most each day and why?

A. I’m not sure there are any two particular things that I think about each day. However, my mind has been occupied by the book project that I’m working on recently. And why does that occupy my mind? Of course, you know. I think the second thing that fills my head is the business that I’m creating (but I won’t say more). It’s on my mind often because it should be. Nevertheless, I’ve got my family sitting pretty at the corner of my mind. They never leave there.

Q. How do you manage to deal with stress as you work?

A. I use the gym when the spirit leads but mostly in the evenings. I take long walks to clear my head also. And I play snooker as often as I can. It’s an opportunity to meet new faces and share a good laugh. It does help deal with the stress, no doubt. Chess also comes in handy when I’m a bit unhappy or frustrated.

Q. What do you feel is the difference between living and existing?

A. The difference is our perception of time. For those existing, time travels through them. So, they often sit pretty as time rides along. Living puts you in a race against time. It gives essence to time. It’s the reason 24 hours is too short for one day. If only it could be 28. Pfffft! But a jolly race against time without prizes to pick at random stops is a spokeless wheel.

Augustine Ojeh

Q. What was the last book you read and what can you say about it?

A. Perfectly Confident by Don A. Moore (Ph.D.). I think Professor Moore does have a lot to say about the dangers of blind optimism and unbacked confidence. I’d say the book is excellently written and laced with relatable research, accurate accounts of events, and exciting exercises to help you stay on track.

Q. Do you think we have a greater purpose or are we just waiting for our turn to die?

A. I think we are on a lap to create our heaven or hell. When this lap is over, we would return to the life that we created, clueless about how and when we created them. So, yes, we do have a purpose albeit its greatness is relative.

I wouldn’t say that I have a job. Just as footballers never called playing soccer a job, writing has never been a job to me. At least, I’ve never seen it that way and probably never will. I’d do something else if it has a negative opportunity cost, like starting and building a business which I’m already doing (won’t say more than that). However, I doubt if any of that would stop me from writing.

Augustine Ojeh on Thursday Talk Series

Q. What is that thing that you see as an obstacle that can stop you from having success?

A. Death.


Thank you very much for the interview, Augustine. I’m really glad to have met you and I look forward to all the amazing things you are set to do. For everyone still reading, thank you for being here. Wish you a spectacular Thursday.

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Do you know that pattern is one of the elements of composition in photography?

Take a peek😁🥰

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Thursday Talk Series on Tobe’s Life and Work As a Photographer

Rigozo

I saw a Bollywood movie yesterday and as always their storyline is intriguing, and the acting was superb and hilarious. The name is A Magical Love Story, and it’s about love, family, fate, curses, deceit, and magic. We know real-life is not the same as a screenplay but we do all we can each day to find happiness. There is no substitute for trying again and again. Sometimes life is to be enjoyed and other times it picks you up, does a little spin, and sets you down. You can be sure that it will take a while before you will be able to find your balance – you will eventually find it. Let have this in mind, “Nature has given us all the pieces required to achieve exceptional wellness and health, but has left it to us to put these pieces together.”—Diane McLaren. Whether you believe that love/life is magical, it’s up to you to write your own story.

Today I’m introducing Tobe and I’ve found him to be one of those people (rare) who are completely honest with themselves. This makes him able to interpret his feelings without trying to convince himself otherwise. He pays attention to details, especially in his work, and always tries to find a balance between business and personal life – to the best of his ability. In his relationship with people, he is understanding and reliable, makes amazing connections (he always knows a guy). I can’t remember our first meeting but we’ve had several easy and open-minded conversations. That said, he’s the first to start conversations with people – he still hasn’t realized that he has an amazing gift of relating with people – even strangers. He is a goal-getter and an exceptional manager, and when it comes to having fun he gets into the mood 100%.

Trivia on Tobe

- A foodie

- Loves to dance

- An Arsenal fan

Q. Can you introduce yourself and what you do?

A. My name is Tobenna Afamefuna Nnamdi Amechi. Yes, I do not have an English name and for a while, I didn’t like it. However, today I am proud of my Igbo names because each of them has specific meanings which are relevant to life and living. I am a photographer and I run a photography business in Lagos, Nigeria.

Tobenna Amechi

Q. Why do you do your job, and would you rather do something else?

I started the business because it was a skill I had and I needed to make money while waiting to get full-time employment. I wasn’t also so bombed with the idea of working for someone except for having the idea of ‘corporate work’ at the time and being responsible. Over time, the reasons for being in business have grown from money-making and now emotional and core business principles. At some point, I just wanted to make money, other times I just wanted to be happy. There was a period it was powered by how people felt when they got served by my business. Now all of those things have faded, and I am more interested in building a business that solves clients’ problems while meeting the needs of the individuals offering the service. There are days in the cause of running this business that I felt I would rather be doing an actual 9-5, step out every day and do actual work, and then come back. I have gone ahead to even apply for jobs on some days. In the end, I am still here going through the motions and believing. I am a corporate guy. I have an affinity for emails, suits, ties, warm regards, etc. It excites me, and I sincerely want to experience it, if I get the opportunity, either by building it into my own business or getting that actual job and maybe just doing it for 6 months. For me, the travails of being a business owner are always looming. There are busy days, lazy days, and days I question my existence and relevance to both myself and the universe. I like activity – purposeful activity – hence I feel very uncomfortable when I am not doing anything. Why do I currently do what I do? I am not sure I know anymore. I believe many entrepreneurs have gone through this phase too. However, I am at the point where I want to prove my relevance to myself. I want to be sure I am not just existing, and inconsequential to the happenings of life.

Q. What two things do you think of the most each day and why?

  • Growth – I am really scared of not measuring up to my mates, of poverty and stagnant.
  • Relevance – I want to make a mark in peoples lives I don’t want to have just existed, I want to have touched lives so when I die in the next 80 years, people can have good testimonies about me.
  • Money – to make more and never lack while giving to people in need.
  • Love – I feel alone most times, I need a girlfriend in my life.
  • Sex – How I am not having it and wish to get married quickly so I can indulge without guilt
  • Family – current and future.
  • Heaven – How I try not to do the many different things I could be doing that seem normal but will cost me eternity, I can’t go to hell Biko.

Q. What is the best thing about what you do?

A. Sincerely, the best thing about it right now is delivering to the clients’ satisfaction and the consequent balance that comes. Of course, making great images satisfy me, and this was the best thing at some point but not now making great images also means the client would be satisfied.

Q. What do you appreciate about yourself and what would you like to change?

A. I appreciate my soft nature which makes me want to do good for people all the time. I also would like to change it, to be a little more strong-willed, not caring what people will say and a lot of other things.

Q. What have you accomplished so far that has made you proud?

A. A little while ago, I was in a virtual meeting with my staff. I looked at my computer screen and saw their names registered and I realized how blessed I was to have two individuals on my team. I am proud to have been able to build Wise Visuals by God’s grace from a one-person team to where it is now. I am proud and grateful for it.

Q. What was the last book you read and what can you say about it?

A. Outliers by Malcolm Gladwell. There is no successful person who didn’t have opportunities handed to them, in most cases they didn’t realize they were opportunities that would make them world-famous. However, they still made the best out of the opportunities that were presented to them, putting in the time and work needed to be great at what they did, clocking their 10,000 hours of work to be excellent. In light of this, I figure that everyone is presented with a series of opportunities in their lifetime, we are tasked to view each season as an opportunity and make the best of it. Achieving expertise at something requires you to have put in much time work approximately 10,000 hours, which the successful people we know put in both voluntarily and involuntarily as a result of the opportunities they were presented with. If this is true which does make sense, then intentional practice over time helps the mastery of and success at one’s craft.

Q. What do you feel is the difference between living and existing?

A. The major difference is impact and self-satisfaction. When you live, you affect lives, small and big and you are happy and self-satisfied doing that.

Over time, the reasons for being in business have grown from money-making and now emotional and core business principles. At some point, I just wanted to make money, other times I just wanted to be happy. There was a period it was powered by how people felt when they got served by my business. Now all of those things have faded, and I am more interested in building a business that solves clients’ problems while meeting the needs of the individuals offering the service

Amechi Tobenna on Thursday Talk Series

Q. What is that thing that you see as an obstacle which can stop you from having success?

A. Inconsistency. I find that I can start things and most times I don’t know how to finish or sustain them. Knowing this is a challenge, has also posed an inhibition to start for me, because I don’t want to start and not finish.

Q. If like a movie your life up to this point is played for you to watch, describe how you’d feel about it?

A. I’d feel how I am feeling now, unsatisfied and some level of regret. Grateful for the wins and optimism and faith for a better ending.


Thank you so much Tobenna for the interview and I hope you find what gives you satisfaction. And thank you everyone for sticking around. Have a blissful Thursday.

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“Your work is going to fill a large part of your life, and the only way to be truly satisfied is to do what you believe is great work. And the only way to do great work is to love what you do. If you haven’t found it yet, keep looking. Don’t settle. As with all matters of the heart, you’ll know when you find it.”

Steve Jobs

Currently Reading

Frank Herbert’s sixth book - Heretics of Dune
I am so proud of myself for getting to book 6

TTS# Drawing Happiness and Becoming Better by Chinenye

Life is really funny. Previously, my biggest challenge was starting a blog, and now it’s trying to keep up with my blog. I don’t even want to talk about where my head has been these days. They say most writers write from experience, theirs or others. For me, a lot of what I write comes from my experiences. I’ve come to realize that it takes a lot of effort for me not to translate my emotions and thoughts into my work. Not everything that I write is doom and gloom but as humans the things that hurt us tend to cling the most. Well, I have good news to chase away the bad vibes. I covered a bridal shower last week and it was so much fun. Also, the pictures I took turned out to be awesome and I got great feedback from the client. I know I mostly put up pictures I took with my phone but I’ll make an exception today. The good news is that I’ll be sharing the images I took from the bridal shower at the end of the interview. I’m so excited that I’m getting better at photography and look forward to breaking records😂

Today’s guest is Chinenye, and she’s one of a kind. I call her Tiney (she’s got ropes for limbs) and I’ve known her for the longest time – watched her grow into a lovely woman. Her favorite thing to do is to draw. She’s got that arty vibes and the attitude. I remember that she could nap for about nine hours and still wake up grouchy. Wow! However, for a very long time, sleeping was a form of coping mechanism for her. The more time she spent sleeping, the less time she had to deal with people and reality in general. I’m glad that she has come so far, and have let more people in. She’s one of my best girls, and I’m always rooting for her. Nenye is also a foodie, eat with her to your detriment. She taught herself to play the guitar – her elfin hands can also play magic on drums – and she now has a special way of loving people that’s open and enduring.❤️


Q. Can you introduce yourself and what you do?

A. My name is Uzomah Faith Chinenye. The 5th child of the Uzomaki clan. I just graduated – so I want to believe (I’ve got no idea what’s next). I studied Fine Arts and Design at the University of Portharcourt, Rivers state.

Chinenyenwa Faith Uzomah

Q. Why did you study your course and would you rather study something else?

A. I have always wanted to draw since I was little because it made me happy ☺. What I mean is, when I’m happy, I draw, and when I’m not happy (sad) I also, draw. Actually my happiness features a great deal in why I chose to draw 😁. I would have loved to study nothing else but Fine Art.

Q. What have you accomplished so far that has made you proud?

A. I’m not so adventurous, to be honest. I don’t like taking risks. I’m a very careful somebody. What can I say is my accomplishment? Well, I got through school. I’m living a better life spiritually, and I’m so overwhelmed by it. I got to be more social and well, I didn’t get fat 😁. I’m proud of my family. They never made the distance noticeable. They are awesome!

Q. Can you share the time when you were certain it was what you wanted to do?

A. Uhm, what can I say about this? It was when I wrote JAMB, which was, fortunately, the period screening was introduced to schools. I felt that it was a sign because I was very nervous and unsure of how I’d perform if post utme had eventually happened. I thought I may not have gotten admission in that case – I was so scared! 😂 😂. I remember that when I saw my JAMB result I started crying. My fear of post utme was real. Then the first and second lists for admissions came out I just taya because I didn’t see my name. My older brother wanted me to come live with him so that I could prepare to sit for another JAMB but I turned down his offer. I was also working at that time and I was convinced that I would still gain admission regardless. I was also advised to take up another course of study at another University which I considered it, and it made me cry a lot. Eventually, the third list came out, and my name was on the list (at last😅). The best thing was that I got what I applied for, Fine Arts and Design. I remember laughing coz’ in my heart of hearts, I no get the strength to write JAMB again, abeg). Another thing that made me certain was the peace I got while praying over my admission when I despaired. The peace was the confirmation before every other thing happened – I gladly cut my hair as I would be starting a new life, in a new place 😂😂.

Q. What do you feel is the difference between living and existing?

A. Well first would be the spelling! Second, to live for me is to complete a cause/course. To live! There is always something to do or something to finish. Meanwhile, to exist is to be a tool 😑. If the carpenter uses a hammer to drive in a nail, who did the actual work? Shey, you get? The person who exists makes no difference or even an effort – just does nothing. But a person who is living is doing something, has a certain goal, and makes a plan on how to get to it.

Chinenye Faith Uzomah sitting in her faculty
Chinenyenwa Faith Uzomah

Q. What is your reaction when people criticize/judge you?

A. Ah! First I die! I have tried all kinds of positive thinking to counter what I hear people say about me, but e no work. It used to be that I would think and think – still do sometimes – and this would make me sad and try to meet up people’s expectations. The more I did, the more empty I felt. There were times I formed introvert sef, that was worse gan. Sometimes I would lash out and leave my tormentors (or were they assassins) scarred. No matter what I did though, it didn’t just feel right. These days, I believe I’m being helped by the Good Lord to not take to heart what people say. I’m breaking out from the former way I dealt with criticism and judgment. I always pray for my own heart, and also for wisdom to direct me. IT HAS BEEN THE BEST AND ONLY SOLUTION FOR ME.😁 Therefore, I’ll stick to the Good Lord.

Q. What do you appreciate about yourself and what would you like to change?

A. I appreciate the fact that God is intentional about my life and I’m responding to him. I appreciate the fact that I can now sincerely talk about the changes that have happened in my life. Nowadays, I accept that I’m wrong😂 my family knows how I like to defend myself whether right or wrong – that’s vewi badt – but I’m getting better at being wise concerning these things sha😂. What I will love to change about myself is the fear of uncertainties.

Q. What two things do you think of the most each day and why?

A. To be very very honest, what I think of is how I can please God and how well. Why? (call me a freak, I kuku have explained what my reaction would be if I am being bad-mouthed). It’s been God and I through school (so shall it be forevermore. Haters die! 😈) and I have been receiving help from him. What I must do and what not to do. Where I should go and where not to go. Who I should keep and who I shouldn’t. How I should not worry so much about family, because God’s got them, and so on. Many people have a lot to say about this, but it is what works for me and I’ll stick to it. Abi now?

Q. What superpowers would you like to have and why?

A. Lol, see me see case! Wetin Musa no go see for gate? 😂 😂 Oh well, I can’t pick reading people’s minds because I suspect I’ll die of migraine. I choose, uhm 🤔having the ability to answer all questions (is that even considered a superpower?) Why? Well, you said I should tell you what powers I’d like to have but I’ve never given it any thought before. All I have, I give to you 😂. I felt like I just had to say something.

I have always wanted to draw since I was little because it made me happy ☺. What I mean is, when I’m happy, I draw, and when I’m not happy (sad) I also, draw. Actuality my happiness features a great deal in why I chose to draw 😁. I would have loved to study nothing else but Fine Art.

Chinenye Uzomah on Thursday Talk Series

Q. If you could, what’s the one thing you’d change about the world?

A. Uhm, one change can affect many other things. It’s something to think properly over, and I think my time with you is up 😂 😂. If I must answer sha, the one thing I’ll change is myself. 😁 A better me, a better world.


Thank you Chinenye (Tiney) for the interview😂 Congratulations on your graduation 🎓 and next time we’ll share your work. Thank you all for being here. Have a lovely weekend. Bye!

Bridal Shower Images

Like, share, and comment below❤️

Thursday Talk Series| Idowu As A Living Oracle

Rigozo

Holla! Have you listened to Ed Sheeran – Shivers? You should do – like right now – I don’t mean now, but after you’ve read today’s Thursday Talk Series you can skedaddle outta here and go listen to Eddie’s latest song if pop is your kind of jam. All week I had it on repeat. The first time I listened to the song I started dancing even though I’m a tragic dancer. I hope I’m never asked to dance to save my life because it would be my obituary. Yes, that bad. But Ed’s Shivers is that good.

Standing on non-existing protocols, I’d like to introduce Idowu Adeyemi, The Oracle (it’s a fact that I always hear a thunderous cheer anytime he’s introduced). If Orishás (traditional Yoruba spirits) walked the earth, it is safe to say that Idowu is an ancient spirit trapped in a human body, but still offering service to humankind. His personality shines through in all of his affairs, and the work that he puts into the things he’s passionate about places him above his peers (notice I didn’t say he puts passion into his work). He’s also one of the best people that I have been privileged to know. He’s a dreamer by nature, a lawyer by profession, and an Orator by might. I believe the world is waiting to know a man like Idowu, and soon they’ll get to meet him. When he’s not busy with legal matters, he reads (African literature is his favorite), cooks, listens to music, take short walks, and engages in lively discussions (from how to develop the reading culture of Young Africans to the which housemate was evicted on BBN).

Trivia about Idowu

He loved to watch Bollywood😂😂😭❤️

Q. Can you introduce yourself and what you do?

A. My name is Idowu Olamilekan Adeyemi but my friends and fans like to call me “The Oracle.” Not that I truly believe that I’m one but it has a nice ring to it, so I stick to it. I am a Lawyer with my practice areas including Intellectual Property Law, Corporate and Commercial Practice, Legal drafting, Research and Writing. So, if you are ever in need of my services, don’t hesitate to reach out. I am also trying to get a Communication Consulting Company off the ground and I am optimistic it will turn out great pretty soon.

Idowu Adeyemi after Law School
Idowu Olamilekan Adeyemi

Q. Why do you do your job, and would you rather do something else?

A. I have to say that I am not one of those privileged people who have the incredible gift of knowing what exactly they want to do with their lives from an early stage. I was a commercial student throughout my secondary school but then I stumbled on law when I was going to write my o’ levels exam and it felt like the right thing to do because it aligned with my natural abilities but then I got to the University and it felt like a total disaster. It took me another year after law school to fall in love with this profession. So, I practice law because I finally believe that this where I am meant to be and I am good at it and it does align with a major part of my personality not to mention the fact that money doesn’t hurt too. As far as doing something else goes, I won’t. I will rather complement my law practice with other creative endeavors that I am certain I have abilities for.

Q. When have you felt like giving up?

A. Good gracious! That has been too many times already. In fact, it use to be everyday. Being a person with disability and living in an unstructured society like Nigeria is a double jeopardy to say the least. And a specific instance of such frustration will be when a prospective employer hinted at my disability as the reason for not getting the job. This had happened more than once but this particular day, I went back home depressed and I was sure I was never going to try again. But after hunger waya my head for a couple of days, I needed no extra motivation. Lol. I figured if the society is not going to give me a space, I can either take it or create one for myself and that is what I have been doing since that time.

Idowu living in the moment at sunrise

Q. What two things do you think of the most each day and why?

A. I think about self and professional development. I want to be the best at whatever I do. My career and future mean a lot to me and I am always thinking about how many positive steps I have taken each day to get closer to it. I think about family too. A lot, but that is a story for another day. Lol.

Q. What have you accomplished so far that has made you proud?

A. Honestly, I have a lot of things to be grateful for. But what I am proud of the most is the fact that I am able to attain independence. My worst fear growing up use to be that I will forever be dependent as a person with disability. It hunted me so bad that I use to cry in my private space but today, e no too hard to drink small garri and groundnut daily. Lol.

The Oracle having a good time
Photo credit: Rigozo

Q. If money was not relevant, what would you do all day?

A. I will sit with peers and engage in interesting and intelligent conversations all day. I will sit with old people and listen to stories about the past and learn more about our various cultures and languages. I will spend more time trying to understand the dynamics and the diversity of humanity. I sure as hell will travel a lot and explore the world beyond my immediate reality and environment.

Q. What kind of people do you allow in your circle?

A. All kinds of people. Everyone is welcome, as long as you are kind, empathetic and you can show and appreciate love. Tribe, race, religion, class and other basis of discrimination do not apply in my relationships.

Q. Do you consider that people are basically good or bad?

A. I think we are both and I think we are more than that. Humanity is complex, it will be cheap oversimplification to say we are either just good or bad. The part of us that we exhibit however is dependent on various factors; like the part of us we have nurtured the most, socialization process, level of knowledge and exposure, how complex the dilemma we are presented with is at the point of making each decision and a lot more. We can only try to do the right thing but we have to admit that we will not always get it right and that’s okay.

Idowu ‘The Oracle’ in Ibadan

It took me another year after law school to fall in love with this profession. So, I practice law because I finally believe that this where I am meant to be and I am good at it and it does align with a major part of my personality not to mention the fact that money doesn’t hurt too. As far as doing something else goes, I won’t. I will rather compliment my law practice with other creative endeavors that I am certain I have abilities for.

Idowu Adeyemi, ‘The Oracle’ on Thursday Talk Series.

Q. What is your biggest complaint about this country?

A. It’s the lack of a system for me. You cannot single out a sector in Nigeria where things are working the way they should. Everyone just dey freestyle and living each day as it comes. It’s pathetic!

Q. What is the one thing you think that should be taught in school about choosing a career that isn’t?

A. Actually, for me, it’s two things. First, it’s okay to figure out your career path much later after school. It doesn’t mean you are a loser or irresponsible or dumb. It only means you are yet to find yourself and that can take a lot of time for some people and it’s absolutely alright. Just don’t give up on yourself. Whenever you wake up is your morning. All you need do, no matter how long it takes is ensure that you wake up. Second, do not underestimate the power of social capital. Great people in your circle are worth infinitely more than money. So, build relationships and don’t burn bridges. When you finally wake up, those people will be there to say good morning to you and help you get off to a beautiful day ahead.


Thank you so much, Idowu for the interview and I wish you all the best. Remember that your dreams are as great as you envision them to be and it’s only a matter of time. And to everyone still reading thank you so much. Also, you can like, comment and share. Have a lovely Thursday.

Below is a little something I wrote for Idowu a while back, hope you enjoy it.

The Oracle,

When they started calling you ‘The Oracle’ back in school, I teased you at every given opportunity. Well, that was my job description as your friend and sometimes tormentor. I tried my best to be at all of your competitions anyway. 

In a packed lecture hall, when it was your turn to speak, I could sink my teeth into the tension in the air. Maybe I didn’t hear all that you said, and that was the least reason why I was there anyway. The main reason was to watch people as they listened to you. 

To see a mass of bodies lean a little further, hold their breaths, and scream as one at the words you said, was euphoric. That you held sway over the emotions and the actions of people was in itself a form of power. And that was when I realized that you may not be a deity, but you were at those moments the most powerful person in the room. 

Dedicated to Idowu Adeyemi.

How I would like to spend my weekend😭

On Getting Better For Myself

Hey guys! I hope you all had a great time and are looking forward to the rest of the month. Well, I have been busy, and it seems like it will be the same until the end of the year – no breaks for me.

It’s has been a bit crazy, and I’m surprised that I haven’t lost my head completely. Hands down I get the best support from the awesome people around me who genuinely care about my physical and mental health. They are the reason I’m able to stay sane and keep pushing. Also, I’m doing the things I care about and it helps me go to work with a lot of positive energy and produce better results.

I should mention that I often think about becoming a better version of myself, lot, and all the ways that it can be achieved. Also, how I struggle to understand and appreciate myself every day and try to do the right things that are right for me. This has helped me to push away people and habits that are toxic and irrelevant to my growth.

Now, it hasn’t been easy, and I would like to share with you those things I have been struggling with the past couple of months and have acknowledged.

Having Anxiety and Stress

I won’t call myself a perfectionist – that’s too high a bar to set for myself. When I start something, I set my mind to do my best. Nonetheless, I’ll say that I struggle to manage situations when they get out of my control because I like to have a firm grasp of things, and do my best to avoid surprises. If things don’t go as planned I start to freak out, get anxious and overwhelmed, and shocks will go through my body. Always, as long as I have to get work done and something messes with my schedule unexpectedly, I just have to breathe to stabilize. Stress gives me legit headaches. My brain, my heart, they just can’t deal with all of that. People’s intentions are great but I prefer to be far away from whatever affects me negatively.

Lack of Organizational Skills

A big shout-out to people who are organized and can work with daily planners to stay productive. The only reason why I’m so inconsistent with blogging I have several things I have to do but I just can’t manage my time well. If I’m being honest I let myself get distracted by a lot of things when I should be productive. I set tasks in my calendar to do for the week and I barely meet up. I feel like my life would be a lot better if I were more organized.

Taking Care Of Myself

I think y’all are beginning to understand how much of a mess I can be and believe me when I say day-to-day. So, I love to take care of myself, but I only do the basics (read the part about anxiety and stress above). Anything that requires me to do extra beyond washing and moisturizing my body, I see as a lot of work. My skin however has been surviving despite my negligence. But for how long? A few days back, I realized that my hair was damaged and my hair loss scared me. I realized after checking for help that stress and too much tension while manipulating myself were the culprits. Now hair breakage is normal, but when you shed hair a lot, that’s scary. So yeah, my hair is unhealthy and I have to fix it or lose it. Of course, I freaked out, but that’s nothing new.

Presently, I’m not entirely happy with myself, but neither am going to throw myself out in the trash. I know I’m getting no worksheet that helps me magically work this out because getting better takes a lot of hard work and commitment. My friend told me that there would always be things that are out of our control, but some things we can control, like reading books, eating well, taking care of our body and hair, making a work schedule, and sticking with it, exercise, or do yoga, and so on. To become better is therefore personal decision to do all that I can take that’s within my capability. Do my best and leave the rest they say.

This reminds me, I’m aware that I haven’t written a story or a poem in a very long time, instead, all the writings I do these days are work-related and I haven’t done photography as much. That is why I will like to take another route from here on out, starting from this post. I’ll be coming in here to dump my thoughts. I don’t mean to pour out every impression or try to bemoan my existence. Lol. I’ll just be sharing snippets of the things I do, books I’ve read, songs I’m jamming to, and how I get through life. Like doing reality checks now and again.

I hope you have a beautiful day. Try to be better for yourself, not for anybody – although people can inspire you. Make sure the conviction comes from you.

Sending love and light,

Until next time.

PS. I’ve started taking care of my hair. It would be a while before it gets better, and I’m looking forward to it.


Phone photography of a gas station
Shot with my phone and edited on snapseed
  • Left Behind
    The abandoned church stood like a man awaiting trial.
  • How To Live Like A Hero
    And the pressure keeps growing and growing and growing until you feel like you are moments away from exploding.
  • The Story of How I Met Mo-Isu
    The apparition introduced himself as Mo.
  • Saturdays Are For Weddings
    It is an unspoken rule that Saturdays are for weddings in Nigeria.
  • On How To Tell Stories Of Hope
    I didn’t think it was possible after all the time I spent wandering and searching for anybody who could understand me, or even see me.

Thursday Talk Series| Live and Love Your Life By Noah

Holla fellas. It feels good to be back this thursday. I’d give you a high five, but you know that’s not possible. Hope you’ve had an awesome week so far. My biggest takeaway this week about life: We can evade reality, but we cannot evade the consequences of evading reality – Ayn Rand.

I’m beyond excited to have Noah here. I thought this introduction would be my easiest yet but mehn I thought wrong. When I first met Noah years ago in Kaduna, it was the breezy, hello and goodbye kinda meeting. He was the boy next door…very cliché, or so I thought (wrong, again). He’d acknowledge my presence with a smile, a nod, or a few words sometimes. However, there were days when he was withdrawn, I felt like condensed air or a fly on the wall. Because he sings beautifully, I suspect a tune plays in his head that shuts out the world. “Yeah, whatever, I don’t care, ” but I did, a lot more than I cared to admit. Maybe I wore him down with my charming/annoying self, or maybe he and his folks took me on as a charity case (I was the new crazy Lagos girl), but things got better. I’ve gotten to know Noah and it has been precious. He is one of my book/music plugs; we have almost the same taste to my surprise (hooked me up with Tomi Adeyemi, Kevin Kwan, Laini Taylor, The Chainsmokers, Calum Scott, etc, and I shared my pancakes with him). He’s a yogi (the serious ones unlike me), and he grows all kinds of plants (he gave me my first lovely aloe vera bush, Catherina, and still helps me with her because I’m not a good plant mom). He’s diligent, dependable, has a wicked sense of humor (aka bad mouth), and can sing every song that Adele has released. Let’s meet Noah☺️


Q. Can you introduce yourself and what you do?

A. My name is Noah Yari. I am a consultant with an organization that mentors entrepreneurs.

Noah Yari in his traditional attire
Noah Yari


Q. Why do you do your job, and would you rather do something else?

A. I do it because I’ve discovered that Ihave a passion for helping people. I get to meet and interact with such beautiful souls and help them rewrite their stories. It’s very fulfilling work. I love what I do. I wouldn’t change it.


Q. What have you accomplished so far that has made you proud?

A. First of all, I don’t believe that you have to accomplish something grand to be proud of yourself. I would say my biggest accomplishment is overcoming depression, self-doubt and anxiety. I used to be quite a basket-case. LOL

Q. What do you appreciate about yourself and what would you like to CHANGE?

A. What I appreciate most about myself is my will power. I’ve realised that I am my only problem and I am the only solution .

Q. Would you consider yourself an introvert or an extrovert and why?

A. I would describe myself as an introvert, mostly because everyone I know says so. I enjoy my own company but I also enjoy the company of others, especially when we are on the same altitude.

Q. If you win a million dollars, what would you do?

A. I’d buy my parents a new house. They deserve that much.

Q. I’ll What do you feel is the difference between living and existing?

A. I always answer this question with that old saying ‘the grass always looks greener on the other side’. I feel people who believe this are those who are just existing and waiting for life to happen to them. I believe that someone who is truly living won’t have the time to compare his ‘grass’ with others because they’ll be too busy watering theirs and making life happen. Don’t wait for life to happen to you, happen to life, and just enjoy the ride, that’s living.

Q. What was the last book you read and what can you say about it?

A. The Girl With The Louding Voice by Abi Daré. It’s a coming of age story about a poor girl with big dreams who refused to be a victim of her circumstances. What I love most about it is that it was written by a Nigerian and set in Nigeria. It was utterly refreshing.

I always answer this question with that old saying ‘the grass always looks greener on the other side’. I feel people who believe this are those who are just existing and waiting for life to happen to them… someone who is truly living won’t have the time to compare his ‘grass’ with others because they’ll be too busy watering theirs and making life happen. Don’t wait for life to happen to you, happen to life, and just enjoy the ride, that’s living.

Noah Yari on Thursday Talk Series

Q. Do you believe aliens exist, if yes, what are they like?

A. I believe aliens exist because the size of the universe is in comprehensively large. It can’t be just us. I don’t know what they’re like but if I were to guess, I’d say they’re not that different from us on the inside. By this I mean they have souls and can experience love, sorrow and pain. I believe they have brains too!

Q. What is that thing that you see as an obstacle which can stop you from having success?

A.The only thing that can stop me from achieving success is not a ‘thing’ really. It’s God. Only the Big Guy/Gal can stop me.


Thank you, Noah, for showing up and I didn’t even have to resort to threats😂 It’s a lazy Thursday guys and I could use a break. If you are still here, thank you so much for reading. Don’t forget to like, share and leave a comment.

You can follow Waking Dreams on Instagram

I promise❤️✌️🏾
  • Left Behind
    The abandoned church stood like a man awaiting trial.
  • How To Live Like A Hero
    And the pressure keeps growing and growing and growing until you feel like you are moments away from exploding.
  • The Story of How I Met Mo-Isu
    The apparition introduced himself as Mo.
  • Saturdays Are For Weddings
    It is an unspoken rule that Saturdays are for weddings in Nigeria.
  • On How To Tell Stories Of Hope
    I didn’t think it was possible after all the time I spent wandering and searching for anybody who could understand me, or even see me.

Thursday Talk Series On Lara of The Wildfire

Rigozo

Fam! Lately, my thoughts are so random, all over the place, and I accuse my mind of deliberately playing ping-pong just to mess with me. I decided to do a bit of self-reflection the other day, you know, ask myself tough questions like, ‘Is it that time of the month? Bank account gathering dust? Did I put on weight or did my jeans shrink? Valid questions. So, I got my answer but I didn’t like it one bit. Lo and behold, I’m suffering from an acute case of nostalgia. Sucks! Now that I have been diagnosed, I just want to find the cure and get well. But now my other self is looking at me and tutting because she says I can only feel better without my memories. I completely agree with her. I think selective amnesia is the way forward, except I can’t just keep the good memories and get rid of the bad. For the time being I’m stuck hauling my nostalgia around like some twisted trophy.

Moving on. Today I have Lara and I’m excited that she’s here as always. I’ve come to understand that people are a lot like mold, they can be found everywhere. However, quite a few of them stick around you and become something more. That’s why Lara of the Wildfire, as she prefers to be called, reminds me of music in all the years that I’ve known her. Sometimes Lara is like a concerto featuring an orchestra of strings, keys, and horns. Other times she’s a solo flute with dark haunting notes. Or a she’s a soft hum you’d have to strain very hard to listen to or else she’d slip away when you least expect, and all that will be left is a terrible ache. She’s like the kind of music that leaves you feeling more than you bargained for. Lara also loves stargazing, writes love letters to the moon, keeps a cat or two as her familiar, and crushes on book characters.😌


Q. Can you introduce yourself and what you do?

A. Heyyyy! My name is Agbaje Olohuntosin Omolara. Most people call me Lara, a few people call me Shukrah, but I really prefer Lara of the Wildfire. It’s quite a mouthful, but it’s such a sexy name! I’m a content manager, so this means I create content for different brands. Blog content, social media content, email content and the works. I’m also training to become a product designer, because tech is where the money’s at, yo!

Lara sitting at a high point in Ibadan
Agbaje Olohuntosin Omolara

Q. Why do you do your job, and would you rather do something else?

A. I started in the world of content creation because of my natural flair for writing. I studied Chemistry at The University of Ibadan, yeah? But after graduation, I started getting writing gigs and it just went on from there. Currently, I’m hella tired of the content world. I’m a creative writer above all else, but this job is sucking the joy out of writing for me, and I’ll very much like to stop before that happens. And that’s the real reason why I am training to be a product designer.

Q. What is the best thing about what you do?

A. Seeing as I’m tired of the job, this might be difficult to answer. But if I absolutely have to, I’ll say the best thing about it is the fact that I get to do it from home. I honestly can’t imagine a world where I have to leave my house every day for work. Am die, mehn.

Q. What do you appreciate about yourself and what would you like to change?

A. I absolutely love how creative I am, especially with words. I can make a story out of any situation and that keeps me entertained, you know? Reality can be too much a lot of times, these stories I tell myself kind of make things easier. What I would love to change…well. I tend to be very forgetful, geez! I would definitely want to change this.

Q. Do you consider that people are basically bad or basically good?

A. Good or bad? Wow. That’s an overly simplistic way to categorize people that are anything but. I don’t believe one person is just good, or that another is just bad. I strongly believe that good and bad is something that we all carry within us, and what we exhibit is the side we nurture. Besides, we never really know what we’ll do in a situation until we’re actually living in it. Will I do the ‘good’ thing when xxx happens? Honestly, there is no telling. I could be a monster.

Q. What kind of people do you allow into your circle?

A. Kind people. I love love kind, deliberate people. Also, I have a natural affinity for writers, readers and dreamers. I kind of just meet them and we decide to do life together.

Q. What have you accomplished so far that has made you proud?

A. I recently published my debut book, Letters, Stamps and Seals, and that book is literally a part of my soul set on paper for the whole world to see. I was freaking terrified before it was published, but I’m also damn proud of myself for what I have done with that book.

Lara at her book launch, Letter, Stamps and Seals

Q. What two things do you think of the most each day and why?

A. (Insert laughing emoji) Food and money na. I never know what to eat, and I like food die! So that’s kind of a recurrent thought. I’m always thinking of money as well, because tbh, money can solve A LOT of your problems! To quote Ari, “Whoever said money can’t solve your problems must not have had enough money to solve em.”

Q. If money was not relevant, what would you do all day?

A. I’ll read! Fantasy, YA, Sci-Fi, Thriller,Poetry, any damn thing that catches my eyes, I’ll read it! I can already picture me lounging all day, reading, drinking tea and eating cake. I’ll also travel a lot and take a lot of landscape pictures. To paraphrase something one of my favorite IG poets said, I have a spinning compass where my heart should be. If money isn’t an issue, I’ll let that compass take me everywhere.

I recently published my debut book, Letters, Stamps and Seals, and that book is literally a part of my soul set on paper for the whole world to see. I was freaking terrified before it was published, but I’m also damn proud of myself for what I have done with that book.

Agbaje Olohuntosin Omolara on Thursday Talk Series

Q. If like a movie your life up to this point is played for you to watch, describe how you’d feel about it?

A. I’d probably say something along the lines of ‘Why the fu*k am I being made to watch this?” while I cringe and try not to die from second-hand embarrassment.


Thank you Lara for the interview, it was my pleasure and all the best with product designing. And thank you guys for showing up every Thursday.❤️

Follow Lara

I’m reading Ayn Rand, Atlas Shrugged, and the book has taken over my life. Literally. It’s Thursday already, you see what I’m saying. The last thing I remember was diving into the book, and that was Monday. A little something from that corner.

It’s yours💕
Picture of the week